As a man I am tired of the reasons often touted by my friends, mainstream media, and even academia as to why I should be a feminist.
The normal arguments are unconvincing and speak little to what is important to me. Here is my list. It’s not an exhaustive list, but it gets to the point. It is not a list of emotions society would graciously allow me to feel. I can already feel and communicate my emotions. A man communicating feelings is like a male cook; you get praised once you can do what most girls can do by age 10. Rather, this is a list of ways where inequality between men and women diminishes my quality of life.
- How many countless dollars have been lost because incompetent men were hired or promoted over extraordinary women? As a business owner, it is important to me to be working with the most competent people for any particular job. Far too often I have seen more capable women be passed up by confident, but less competent, men and can only imagine how much businesses has been lost due to these decisions.
- In serious partnership or marriage it simply make more sense to have strong earning potential on both sides.
- How many technological advances have we left undiscovered because a brilliant woman wasn’t given proper funding for her ideas? How many diseases still take lives because the right questions and conceptions of how to approach the problem was held in the mind of a woman and not a man?
- Children are important to men, but the current concept of masculinity ignores its nurturing aspects. The culture of fatherhood has been disregarded, and at times the nurturing qualities of men can go underdeveloped. This robs many men of the joys of child-rearing. Women by in large get majority custody when separating. This is not due to the courts; rather, it is simply do the prevalent culture we have where women are often more prepared, ready, and self identify as a nurturing parent. Men are great parents too, but we don’t stress the nurturing qualities of men which leads to conscious and subconscious decisions that often limit contact with a father and their children in separation.
- Violence against women has created challenges for men, women, and children. As a man I am angry with other men for the trauma they have induced. These create barriers to intimacy as violence, sexual abuse, and silence about these abuses become hurtles that a staggering amount of women in this world must face. I am terrified that if I have a daughter she will have to live one of the many unconscionable and dangerous stories I have been told. I am saddened that I may not know one woman who has not been touched by abuse in their life in some form or another.
- I am a feminist because I find it stupid to chose a weaker link as a partner to boost up my ego when I could forge ahead with someone as a strong team.